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pady-oe

don't know how to do it

6 posts in this topic

I need help getting better with my relatioship with people.

I get easily daunted by things, books, people virtually everything, so for this I try to be meticulous of things very important. Being meticulous makes me mess up with people who care for me, in the sense that I become so forgetful or absent minded of people probably in my last encounter by not reaching them or not really fixing anymore importance to them. Do you know I ended a relationship due to this reason. My being meticulous has now affected me negatively that once I leave a town for the other and can't see the people in the last town I get daunted with chatting them or calling to hear their voices. The purpose for this lengthy report is that

1)I am seriously, truly attached to this lady I haven't really met enough; though I know she is very reserved, each time I try to show a sense of interest, I sometimes get sarcasm or disdain in return. For this reason, I get easily fed up to think she doesn't need me around and

2)those who care for me are gradually detaching themselves from me because I do not respond their fair treatments.

I need help responding to people consistently and help making friends and getting this beauty of my heart to like me for who I am.

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1) This is from experience, if you like someone but they can't make enough time to spend with you or are too reserved in what they're telling you, then it's not a good sign for a stable relationship.I know you may not like this, but it may be best to leave her where she is if you like her that much but she doesn't open up to you. You need to be around someone who will listen to you, speak to you about themselves and make time fr you.

 

2) Simply put, don't over exert yourself just to please a few people. I know being around people may make you feel good, but if you try to please everyone, then you will end up exhausted. Only be around people who are going to accept you for who you are and not for what you can offer them. If there are people who are only talking to you when you have something they want or want you to do something for them and then leave you hanging when you need someone to speak to, then those are not people you want to be friends with. Basically, speak with as many people as you can to see which ones click and which ones don't

pady-oe likes this

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1) This is from experience, if you like someone but they can't make enough time to spend with you or are too reserved in what they're telling you, then it's not a good sign for a stable relationship.I know you may not like this, but it may be best to leave her where she is if you like her that much but she doesn't open up to you.

I love the truth, but I really respect and like this lady; she's very reserved and I think that's how she is. I'll try to get closer to her, understand her and see how far it gets me. love really grows and I believe we'll get there.

2) If there are people who are only talking to you when you have something they want or want you to do something for them and then leave you hanging when you need someone to speak to, then those are not people you want to be friends with.

This sounds like me not them, they are the ones making time to check up on me and am the one who doesn't respond/relate well. Not like its intentional but it just happens

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Yeah, you can continue to speak with her and see how far you can go. If you really want to be with her then continue to be as open as possible, but not too much too soon, just in increments. But if it's weeks later and nothing seems to have changed for the better then it may be time to consider expanding your options.

 

Oh, I see. Yeah, I've been there. I bet they catch you at bad moments. Just be prepared to talk when you go out around other people, especially your friends

pady-oe likes this

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You know Paddy-oe, you are just the sweetest. You try to hard dearest. But then again it is your efforts that saw me through difficult times as well, so I for one are extremely grateful that you are exactly who you are. It's your care and concern that people note. Trust me on this. And honestly if they cannot see it you should not break your mind about it. You such a busy young man. Working so hard against difficult odds to reach them.

I hope you got your lady.

pady-oe likes this

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Not yet, I haven't chosen my lady. Just this time around my mind seem so far from relationship. I'll spend my time harnessing my goodness and rejecting parts of me I do not like. You know everyone's worth the care, only that those who appreciate it deserve it more; for this I'll let my lord work in me to choose the most appropriate woman to accompany me on this adventurous journey of life.

Thanks aunt Aisha, I feel like my head will swell and burst from the love you show.

Ilse likes this

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