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flowerchild

So i have a question for the guys concerning rape and scars around the pubic area. 

8 posts in this topic

I was raped when i was younger and my attacker cut me a few times around my genitals. I have some pretty serious/obvious scaring now. 
I've not been in a sexual relationship since then, so i was wondering would guys be disgusted/freaked out by the scars? And should i warn them ahead of time or what? 
Thank you  :)

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Personally I would not be disgusted. I might get 'freaked' initially were I to discover them without some warning/preparation, But I would soon get over that. 

If they truly loved you, then that part of your past won't matter to them. :) 

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Most guys wouldnt say anything I dont think, they would just carry on. 

If it bothers you then maybe you could talk about it first

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I think if you are with someone you feel safe with and trust it will be okay. Beyond the physical scars, you may want to discuss with a prospective lover your past (or as much as you are comfortable discussing).

There may be other, invisible, scars that could affect intimacy with this person. Better to prepare for both the physical and emotional repercussions for your own sake.

Ultimately, I don't think a person that loves you will care at all about those scars.

 

Hawk

 

 

 

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If your emotionally scarred as well as physically scarred then I really think its wise to let your Partner(s)know what has happened before you enter into any kind of relationship.

You will probably find some are sympathetic and may just want to hold you for a while. :-) 

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It wouldn't bother me. Most guys don't spend a lot of time down there exploring anyway. I mean do they? About half the time I just feel to see if it's wet and to guide myself to where I need to go. Now sure if you're all dressed up in lacy lingerie and have candles and are doing the whole you take your turn and I'll take mine thing then I'm sure he'll notice. I just don't think most guys would even comment on it. You can't really see down there when you are actually having sex unless you're trying real hard and it just never seemed to me to be what I wanted to look at. There's a pretty face and some sexy lips and BOOBS by golly to look at. Yeah he might not ever even figure it out. You have a scar where? Oh I didn't notice with your boobs hanging out...

Padre J Roulston likes this

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@flowerchild thank you for being brave enough to reach out to us.  Discussing issues like this are never easy.  That being said to answer your question in my personal opinion I would be more concerned about making sure you are comfortable with what we are doing than how you look.  

Sex has nothing to do with how someone looks in my opinion either... it's all about what you do, and how you do it... 

So personally I got for Personality > Eyes > Smile > Other things > Then Figure

Let's not forget... light switches are wonderful things for insecurity :)
 

pady-oe and Ilse like this

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If it makes you feel any better I recently dated a girl with some serious leg scarring and it did't bother me at all.  Actually, I thought it was kind of cool, tbh.  It ain't just chicks that dig scars :)

 

Oh I should add:  I know a guy who's dating a girl who has really has pretty intense burn scars covering much of one side of her body and face and they seem happy.  Don't know how her private areas look but I'm sure it doesn't interfere with anything.

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