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Lano

Woman Machine

13 posts in this topic

Why aren't more people working on this?  We need to be able to build women in our backyards, assemble their body parts and personality, fine tune them to the perfect compatibility and working order, and oil them up to keep them...er....lubricated.   Thoughts?

In all seriousness, a bit frustrated about online dating and a lack of social opportunities to talk with real women face to face.  PLEASE NO OBVIOUS ADVICE ABOUT PUTTING MYSELF OUT THERE.   Where's the relationship forum anyway?  

Anyone want to "wah, wah, wah" this out with me?  Anyone want my esssssssennnccccccceeeee.

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1 hour ago, EinChorMan said:

they're working on it in japan... but seriously wheres the challenge in that?

 

Do you have any idea how hard it is for Komodo Dragons to pick up human women?

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I hear Komodos have pretty strong essence, maybe you just need to eat more mint so it's not as scary to the lady people. 

Also, funny post. Do you use your sense of humor to attract prey? You should, it might work.

Docteur Ralph likes this

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18 minutes ago, emerge said:

I hear Komodos have pretty strong essence, maybe you just need to eat more mint so it's not as scary to the lady people. 

Also, funny post. Do you use your sense of humor to attract prey? You should, it might work.

Illogical.  Anything that would reduce the levels of bacteria/venom-riddeness of my mouth would decrease my fitness as a predator and therefore make me less attractive.  The joke idea is novel, I could try that.  

Why did the human fall down?  Because their evolutionary design is flawed and they don't have tails to help them balance.  Bwahahahahaha!

Edited by Lano
typo
emerge likes this

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Online dating is shit because you are mostly judged on you pics, if you dont have good pics you wont make it. and if you have good pics your probably a catfish.

You are pretty funny though, get out there!

emerge likes this

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7 hours ago, Nix said:

Online dating is shit because you are mostly judged on you pics, if you dont have good pics you wont make it. and if you have good pics your probably a catfish.

You are pretty funny though, get out there!

But I'm tired of girls only caring about me because of my big sense of humor.

Docteur Ralph likes this

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When I browse matches on okcupid...there are guys.  Meaning guys who have their profile listed as female.  And not transgender guys either.  It's like okcupid is trying to tell me something.

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I suspect it isn't so much trickery but laziness or lack of attention.  A dude created a profile, selected "female" accidentally, and then never signed on again.  

Which I suspect is part of the problem.  There aren't that many people in my vicinity with an account, and likely many of them don't take the site that seriously, and just let the messages pile up and click on one if they like the photo out of boredom.  

As far as trickery goes, I suspect that many of them women are being deceptive in this: Many of them are looking for hookups but don't say that they are.  It says on their profile "not looking for a hook up", but the way they answered the match questions, and which questions they chose to respond suggests that they're more interested in sex than they let on.  Like literally more than half of the questions this one chick responded were related to sex.  That one part has honestly been bothering me a bit the past few days.  It's sobering in a bad way.  

It's funny, the first couple of months I used it, I found someone to chat almost right away.  After a long time away I've been back with a vengeance on it, and no one's biting!  

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Much as we hate to admit it, relationships are almost always based on physical attraction. I used to just crash apartment complex pools in the summer and hit on unsuspecting women. Yeah real unsuspecting, hanging out beside a pool with a teeny bikini and makeup, about as subtle as a bleached blonde sitting at a bar stool with an unlit cigarette. I met more women like that than at bars to be honest, and I hit them every weekend too. Plus there was a big wave pool that hundreds of people would be at every day all summer long. That place was like a smorgasbord of jailbait... at least at the apartment complexes the women were usually old enough to move out on their own and were looking for their first life adventures. I tried to fill the bill.

Come on nix, you're the dragon trainer here, teach him to fly!

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6 hours ago, Docteur Ralph said:

Much as we hate to admit it, relationships are almost always based on physical attraction. I used to just crash apartment complex pools in the summer and hit on unsuspecting women. Yeah real unsuspecting, hanging out beside a pool with a teeny bikini and makeup, about as subtle as a bleached blonde sitting at a bar stool with an unlit cigarette. I met more women like that than at bars to be honest, and I hit them every weekend too. Plus there was a big wave pool that hundreds of people would be at every day all summer long. That place was like a smorgasbord of jailbait... at least at the apartment complexes the women were usually old enough to move out on their own and were looking for their first life adventures. I tried to fill the bill.

Come on nix, you're the dragon trainer here, teach him to fly!

Honestly, I don't really have illusions of having a great career at getting girls out of their panties, I'm more curious to start dating and getting to know different women and seeing what's out there for me.  I'm just really bad at meeting women, and unfortunately there aren't any apartment complex pools nearby that I could wander into, or if there are, I'd feel like a creep.  

I keep telling myself to just go to a bar and try to meet people, but it's a daunting task for me.  I don't have any barfly friends and I get social anxiety.  It's improved over the years as I've forced myself into social situations to try and alleviate it but it's a slow and steady race to the finish there.  

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