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silla_1111

How to tell a child his daddy is gone?

5 posts in this topic

This morning we got some terrible news. My nephew's father has died. He flipped his car late last night. 

My nephew spent all last year just waiting for his daddy to get out of prison and than just 10 months of being out he died. My mother and I just don't know how to tell him. How do you tell a six year old that someone is dead? 

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First of all I would like to express my condolences. It is never easy to lose someone. 

All you can do is tell him the truth. Be open and honest with him. Then support him in whatever way he needs. 

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I never had to tell a child something like that, so I can't offer any advice to soften the blow. 

However, I have been in a situation where a grandparent died and my mom never told me (I didn't even go to the funeral or wake, etc.)

Nothing good came of that, it was just confusing for me.  And his right to know the truth trumps any uncomfortablity you have about telling it to him.  

I think most kids are probably stronger than we realize.  Have faith in that strength, doubting it will only make it weaker.  Be open, be clear, and be supportive, like padre said.  

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My children were at my parent's house and my mom had a heart attack. My sister actually took control of the situation since I was hundreds of miles away and she handled it perfectly. She told them grandma had gone away to heaven and wasn't coming back, but that she was in a better place. Then they told stories all day about their favorite memories and times spent with grandma. They handled it extremely well and they were 6,7, and 9 years old. 

I'm sure it will be tougher with it being his dad, but there is no other way but the truth. I am not an especially religious person but I was very glad they were there with my sister who is extremely religious and even works as a secretary in a church.

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